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Well, Well, Well. Ghost Story #1

So, the first ghost I ever saw was standing over my bed looking down at me.

When our eyes met, she started shaking her finger at me and saying, “Well, Well, Well.”.  I had no idea what she was referring to or why she would be saying that.  I was 15; I wasn’t a bad teenager, wasn’t into anything bad or crazy.  I was just trying to get to sleep and thinking about school the next day.  And there she was.

And I was totally freaked out.

I did the whole pulling-the-covers-over-my-head thing, absolutely terrified to poke my head out.  But, the need for air got the best of me and so I stuck my head out.

And she wasn’t there.

And I never saw her again.

But I did see a really tall man peering down at me one night when I fell asleep on the couch.  This was probably 4 years later, in the same house.  He was looking at me with such curiosity and interest. He was dressed like a farmer, if a farmer has a dress code (you know, dirty jeans, plaid flannel shirt (I am NOT trying to piss off all the farmers out there!)).  He was really tall with short silver hair and really kind eyes.   Kinda like Ralph, but taller and thinner.

Then he simply stood up, rose up above the couch, and left through the patio doors.

Never saw him again either.

Same house, probably 2 years later, I was in bed trying to get to sleep one night, had the house to myself, when one of the stools at the kitchen island started moving around.  I could hear it above me, like someone had just stood up and pushed it back a bit so they could walk away.  That one really startled me for some reason – even more than actually seeing them.  I’m not the only one who has had an experience in this house (PS: house has no history except ours.  We cleared the land and built it).  My aunt was vacuuming one afternoon when she was tapped on the shoulder and asked, “What are you doing?”.  She thought it was one of us fooling around and frustratingly turned around shouting, “I’m vacuuming, what does it look like?”

Only nobody was there.  We were out for the day.  Nobody was home except her.

I moved out then, into town.  Never really thought much of it again.  Never told anyone about the first two experiences, and never saw them again.  The voice asking “what are you doing?” was never heard again.

Not very exciting really but it was a haunting none the less.  I should ask my brother if he every saw or heard anything there in that house.  He’s never mentioned it, but I do know that he sees ghosts too… because he saw the one that was haunting my house about 20 years later.

That is Ghost Story # 3, and that one will come later…

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It’s all about me.

Now that Oscar is almost one year old, I’m ready to start doing things for myself again.

*GASP*

The first year of his life, well, it was all about him.   And rightly so.  I mean, of COURSE it’s all about him, but what I’m trying to get at is that various choices and decisions we made simply limited my ability to be away from him, ie: exclusively breastfeeding, no baby sitters, etc etc.  And it’s all good, I’m delighted that we made those choices.  Oscar and I have quite the attachment.  And now that he’s becoming more “independent” and stretching his wings, I can stretch mine a bit too.

Here are a few things on my to-do list.  And to do now, not someday.  Nope, this is an immediate game plan.

1.            Join a gym.  Or something.  I’m so tired of NOT finding clothes that fit me, in this new post-baby body.  I’m tired of spending way too much money on clothes that just don’t look good, or clothes that I only wear a few times and THEN realize they just don’t look good (how f*cking embarrassing.  I used to be so fashion forward and pulled together.  Now I’m just a hot mess.).   Instead of all that (and frustration!), I may put that money into a gym membership.  Maybe.  Gym’s make me nervous.  But that’s a WHOLE other story.

2.            I’m going to get out with my best gal pal more often. We were chatting the other night and realized that we’ve GOT to get together more.  We’re aiming for at least 2 nights a month or so. We really miss each other and we really miss adult conversation… not to mention opening a bottle of wine and solving all the world’s problems!

3.            I’ve joined a mom group.  Well, it’s a baby group, but our kids are still all too young to really engage with each other, so it’s more of a mom group.  I haven’t really connected with any of the moms in any sense of the word, but it’s SO NICE just to chat with other adults!  Even just listening to them chatting amongst each other makes me feel better and more connected… and less like a retard for not realizing when my son started waking up during the night that MAYBE HE WAS HUNGRY for crying out loud. Because, by listening to other mom’s, it’s happened to them too.  We’re not retards.  We’re just sleep-deprived moms who lost a few brain cells at birth.  That’s all.

4.            And finally on my list?  My husband and I are going to try to get out together more.  Once or twice a month (probably once) we’re going to do dinner or grab a coffee and walk Robson,  or whatever.  But we’re ready to leave our precious little guy with my auntie for a few evenings here and there so we can get out and enjoy each other.  And by “enjoy”, I totally mean “ignore each other, together, while window shopping and sipping lattes on Robson”.

When did you start taking time for yourself again?  In what ways?  Did you find it difficult at first to be away from your little one, even for a few hours?  How did you reconnect with your spouse after baby?  TALK TO ME!

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Mooless in Vancouver

It’s coming close to Oscar’s first birthday.  Since I’m now a mom and he’s my son, I’m going to try to make his cake.  Cupcakes, actually.  And it’s a big deal for me.  I somehow lost all domestic inclination over the past few years.  So here I am, wanting to be this domestic goddess for my son’s first birthday and it hit me…. my son is allergic to dairy.  What kind of cake, what kind of icing, can I make without dairy.

That would be any good.

I put the call out on Twitter and Facebook.  Two of my good friends sent me recipes.  One was much too complicated (and called for chocolate… which has dairy, this was going to be more difficult than I thought.)  The other has no dairy, no eggs, and is simple as hell. So I tried it yesterday.

It is DELICIOUS!

I can’t believe how moist the cake is.  And so rich and yummy.

And dairy free!!!  (And egg-free. So all of a sudden my kid is a vegan…)

Here’s the recipe for all you mom’s with dairy and egg allergic kids.  Hell, the recipe is fantastic for anyone who loves chocolate!  Chocolate Oil Cake.  YUM.

Will get back to you on the frosting…

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Things YOU’LL wish you didn’t know

It’s been almost a year since I gave birth.

When will I stop peeing myself when I sneeze?

Argh.

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Things you wish you didn’t know

I walked around the corner today only to find my cat, Chicken, up on the dining room table licking the BOWL OF PEANUTS.

FML.

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So there ARE enough hours in the day!

But only clockwhen your child NAPS.

I’m so grateful that Oscar sleeps through the night.  And I’m SO grateful that he sleeps until 8:30 or so.  And it’s funny that when he wakes up the odd time at 7am, I’m all like, “Oh God no, please no, a few more minutes, please….”.  And then I get happy and excited to see him so I jump out of bed to start our day together.

But one GOOD thing about Oscar waking up that early is that he actually naps during the day.  And so I can get things done.

For the past few months he’s been only napping (for the most part anyways) about 1/2 hour in the morning and 45 minutes or so in the afternoon.  That’s just not enough sleep for a little dude (well, apparently it IS or he’d sleep more I suppose….).  Anyhoo…. the 7am days I’m finding he’s ready for another nap at 9:30 or 10am and he has a good one.  I have time to have a shower (AND EVEN MAYBE SHAVE MY LEGS IN THERE!) and finish my coffee and straighten up from breakfast.   Then we can do our thing and have lunch at a normal hour and then he’s ready for another nap around 1 or 2 or so.  And it’s a minimum of 1.5 hours!  And it’s delightful for me!  I put him down at 1:15 today, it’s 3:45 now and here’s what I’ve accomplished:

Folded laundry, loaded washer, cleaned kitty litter, fed cats, cleaned living room, cleaned kitchen, prepared his dinner to take with us tonight, cleaned out inbox, updated facebook, uploaded and labelled photos, updated facebook again, cleaned up Twitter, actually tweeted for the first time in ages, listened to a brief teleseminar, moved laundry to dryer, cleaned bathroom, vegged out, folded laundry, wrote this post.

And now I’m freaked out that he’s sleeping so long that I’m going to sign off and turn on the monitor to make sure the little lad is breathing, lol!

Happy to be back.

S.

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Boo!

haunted_houseI know halloween is long past, but seeing as my new favourite show is Ghost Hunters, and another one I’ve just discovered this weekend was Celebrity Ghost Stories (LOVED Joan Rivers), I feel like sharing my own ghost stories.

BUT… it’s 10:50pm and I’ve got to get O for his dream feed (which I’m going to start to wean him off.  Wish me luck.), so the ghost stories will have to wait for another day.

A teaser?

I’ve lived in 3 haunted houses.  The last one ROCKED.  It was crazy. I’m talking howling, knocking, windows flying open, and a tall man in a groovy suit.

Until I can make it back here to write about it, care to share yours in the comments?

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Playground politics.

playgroundI’m a great mom.

So what, I haven’t taught him how to blow a kiss or give a high-five… I’m still a great mom (even though I didn’t feel like a great mom when his uncle was trying to get him to blow a kiss and high-five last night….).

I love him unconditionally.  I’m there when he needs me – even (or especially) at 4am when he’s been up crying for 2 hours with a tooth coming in.  I fret over the simplest decisions (ie: feeling like a bad mom when I give him beef stew, gasp, TWO NIGHTS IN A ROW), and lose sleep over difficult ones (h1n1 vaccine anyone?) (which we have decided against).  I teach him everything I can think of (and as a mom, I’m teaching him even when I don’t think I am.  And am teaching him by example.  So there’s a segue into a future post on swearing.  F*ck.), I take him outside in the chilly air and rainy days for long walks because even though I don’t feel like it… he LOVES it.  I drive him around for 2 hours in the car when I know we’ll be out late – to make sure he gets a nap.  (How many times a week do I hit the Starbucks drive through I wonder?).  My whole life is about loving him, protecting him, teaching him, raising him, and just doing what’s best for him.

And I would imagine alot of you reading this feel the exact same.

So I wonder how the other moms view me as they witness my 10-month old son crawl over to their child and promptly poke them in the eye.  Or pull their hair.  And I sit there like a deer in the headlights, kinda panicking on the inside not really sure what to do about it, other than squeak out the words, “Oscar, be gentle”, and gently remove his hand (or their hair from his vice-like grip).  I mean, it would be a different thing altogether if he was 13 and picked a fight.  But he’s 10-months old and is just being a 10-month old.  He’s just discovered pointing, so all he does, constantly, is point at anything and everything and sometimes that pointing at things is directly in a little friends’ EYE.

And then there’s the times when their little ones crawl over to Oscar and promptly do the same.   It happened yesterday at the playground.  A cute little guy was hanging out with Oscar and reached up and grabbed his hair.  Before his mom could even notice, I think, I said, “Oh, gentle now”.  And I felt like it really wasn’t my place, but it was automatic.  I wasn’t scolding by any means (as far as I’m concerned, there’s not a reason in the world to scold a 10-month old), just automatically said it.

Was that wrong of me?  If someone else had of said that to Oscar, I wouldn’t mind (at least I don’t think I would).

Or am I just making a mountain our of a molehill?

What the hell am I going to do when the days of pushing and shoving and not sharing come along.

Sigh.

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Stop the presses!

Borum

So, outside of being Oscar’s mom and doing Oscar things and posting it all here… I have another life.

Ok, so it’s not like this totally cool alter-ego or anything (I ain’t no Batman), well, it kinda is.

To me.

Anyway, I have an Administrative Services business.  I’ve recently started back to work on a regular basis (other than managing a few clients’ businesses since O was born) and am back with my established clients, and some new ones, and am grateful beyond belief that I get to use that side of my brain again.  Even if only a few days a week right now.

To get to the point, I met Paul Levy of Running a Hospital when I was pregnant and through the power of the Internet we’ve stayed in touch throughout.  And God Love Twitter for keeping the What’s What and Who’s Who in order, because as a new mom if I don’t have it written down in front of me, well, it just doesn’t exist!

And once again, to get to the point, he is having an online auction to benefit the Sidney Borum Centre.  You can read about it on my alter-ego professional site, and you can bid on cool items, and you can bid on 5 hours of Administrative Services care of Moi!

Whatcha waiting for?

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World Aids Day

Just a quick something before I head out for the day enjoying the rare Vancouver sunshine (hey, it usually rains until May!)… if you’re on twitter, end your tweets with the #red hashtag.  Show your support for World Aids Day today!

Oh, and follow me!

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